Grey Haired Parenting

Hitting in the toddler years is the topic of the day over on Sparx’ blog.

As usual she sparx’d a memory for me. Just how does one discipline two small boys only 21 months apart in these enlightened days of ‘no hit’ parenting.

I’d read the Sears guy who seemed to think that if you held Baby enough, fed on demand and held appropriate expectations that Baby would just want to behave rightly.  Too good to be true you say?  Yup that’s how well it worked for us too.

Next we tried 1,2,3 Magic. The principle being that on the first infraction of rules you say 1 on the second you say 2 and on the third you say 3 ok take 5 (minutes in time out). Which to Hair Two meant “oh dear she’s counting I’d better straighten up and fly right” and to Hair One meant “oh cool I can do three things before I have to behave!”

So when Hair One was about 3 or so I became a disciple of parenting guru…….

 

hoping to keep my own hair from going quite as white as hers thanks to the chaos I was living in.

Barbara goes on and on about  natural consequences and consistency.  It all seemed to make sense and let’s face it I needed all the help I could get.

Now for hitting Barbara had a rule.  You hit; you sit.  The idea is that if you hit you have to go sit down for the same number of minutes as you are old.

Worked a treat on other people’s kids.  Other mothers could just mention the Rule and diffuse a hitting event in the making.

Not so much at our house where Hair One gleefully would whack Hair Two over the head with a toy and then run to sit down on the chair. Three minutes inactivity vs the joy of brother bopping was a no brainer for this brat pack wanabe.

Fortunately, it turns out, they grow out of the hitting stage!

As for the discipline methods oddly, while it never worked when they were small, the 1, 2, …..(we never get to 3) works a treat on my now teenagers. 

The joke being, of course, that I have no clue what I’d do if we did get to 3!

Which explains my dyed hair.